Fri the 1st of May – Dream Catcher

It’s Labor day in Italy. Even though there’s a bus schedule, there are no busses, no taxis in sight. Hege, Richard and I cluelessly wander down the street not quite sure what to look for…Perhaps divine intervention…Hege takes charge and asks a security guard for assistance. He gives us a taxi number and while we wait for our taxi, a bus miraculously appears! We’re even more excited when the driver confirms he is going to town. So we hop on, I call to cancel the taxi, only to find that after 5 meters the bus halts and everyone steps out including the driver! It has reached its final destination and will probably only depart in 30 minutes.

What??

At that moment, a disgruntled taxi driver races towards us. It was too late to cancel anyway and we’re happy to see him. In all the confusion, an American tourist also lost his way on the bus, not realizing this was the end of the road. We offer him a ride and after a chaotic morning, we finally head to town.

And that’s how we met Joseph.

It’s very easy to connect with him. He’s a New Yorker of Sicilian origin. He’s traveling on his own and after a week in Rome, decided to take a day trip to Perugia. I take them to the sunny terrace with the view and we relax over cappuccinos and sandwiches. Many different subjects are broached. From serious to not so serious. Lady Gaga is blaring in the background and we find ourselves singing along to Po-po-po-po-poker face…It’s a very catchy tune even though she’s a little Cu-cu-cu-cu-cu. Slightly embarrassed, I tell them about how, at the bookstore, I peaked into Madonna’s brother’s biography of his sister. What an idiot…We touch upon the swine flew and the media hype around it. On to how some psychopathic anti-monarchist drove into the crowd in the Netherlands killing 6 and harming countless others. This somehow leads us to torture techniques and how easily men can be incited to cruelty...Back to technology and of course Facebook, always a winner. Of course we also talk about what brings us to Italy, our important journey here with all the twists and turns along the way. Joseph listens attentively, laughs at the humorous passages, shows empathy at the serious ones. He then takes a small object out of his bag and hands it to me. It’s a Dream Catcher. It was given to him by his mother before leaving and he wants me to give it to Mara for good luck. What an incredible act of kindness from a person who only a couple of hours ago was just a stranger to us. Moments such as these fully restore my faith in the Universe and maybe our paths crossing was serendipity.

Hospital visiting hours start at 3pm. They’re very strict and only one visitor is welcome…A day! I explain to the nurses that Richard and Hege came all the way from the Netherlands and they’re willing to make an exception. We take turns, first Hege, then Richard then me.

If it were at all possible, Mara would have a membership card to the Frequent Wretchers Club. Since last night, her visits to the bathroom are very regular and after relieving herself for the umpteenth time of any remnants of food, she walks back into the room and weekly jokes: “See Paulita, I’m hungover from Queensday too”. I tease: “Hermanita (little sister), if you had hair, I’d hold it back for you”. Her body’s reaction to this treatment is much more violent than to the one in Amsterdam. That one now seems like a walk in the park…

After a while, she feels better and we chat about our day. I tell her about Joseph and the dream catcher. She’s very moved and without any hesitation says he must be an angel. I don’t know if it’s the chemo talking or if Italian Catholicism is rubbing off a little too strong. No matter, Joseph, if you read this, know that the dream catcher is hanging over Mar’s bed and that you are now officially her “Angelo Giuseppe”!

She doses in and out of sleep and just as I am about to pick up my book, she has a moment of lucidity and yaps away about one thing or another. This goes on during the entire visit. Richard and Hege confirm she did the same with them and it makes us smile affectionately.

While she snoozes, I look around the room. It’s very sterile. Any attempt at personalizing it is either discouraged or forbidden. There is however a life size picture of Minnie Mouse on the door. Minnie is wearing a pretty little red dress, a matching bow and is flirtatiously batting her eyelashes at us. She brightens the room and Mara likes her. Next to Minnie, on the opposite wall, a crucifix is hanging staring at Mara. We stare back and I ask her with a hint of humour (or maybe not) how she feels about having Jesus up there. She replies: “Yeah…I don’t mind having him around either”.

Before I leave for the evening, Mar pretends to pout and sighs. She misses Herald… Before you get any ideas, Herald is a stuffed animal. A fluffy dog. He’s been her faithful companion through out her hospital stay in Amsterdam. She’s tucked Herald countless times under her neck for much needed support! He’s given her comfort through the lonely hospital nights yet sadly he is now denied access to her room in Italy…I pleaded with the nurses but the best they can do is put Herald in a plastic bag which would defeat the purpose. We haven’t given up yet. I’ll continue this fight tomorrow…